Weekend

On Thursday afternoon my dh called and told me that Mamaw, after suffering with alzheimers for the past 3-4 years, passed away. So we have been over with Papaw, trying to give our support and love, and also catching up with all the relatives that made their way to his side.

They would have been married 52 years on June 19. They knew each other as children and grew up together, falling in love at a young age. They wrote while he was in the army for several years after joining at the age of 17. He hitch-hiked back home and they got married when he was 20, she, 18. They started a business, had 2 children and 11 grandchildren, of which I married the oldest.

She may have been from the sticks of Virginia, known to them as Cracker's Neck or Coulwood or Cleveland, (in fact the family jokes about how in the world Papaw found her.) but she was some kind of lady. Always had her hair fixed, lipstick in place. She loved things of beauty, and her home was kept in apple-pie order. My dh and I lived with them for 3 months last fall, and she may not have been present in mind, but she was in spirit.

I cried with the rest of the family this weekend. I shed tears for Papaw, who vowed he would never take her to a nursing home and lovingly cared for Mamaw for the past few years. Who lost his wife a long time ago, and finally put her to rest at the age of 70. Who gave up hopes and dreams along with the wedding band he laid to rest with her. Who wrote in an album above her picture, "If it ain't forever, it ain't love," and lived it out for her and all those around them.

I cried for my mother-in-law and the rest of the family, who have welcomed me as a member, made me feel at home, and lived out Mamaw's legacy through her illness.

I cried for myself, with regret that I barely got to know that great woman. When I met her 4 1/2 years ago, she had already lost some of her conversational skills and ability to follow along. I could still sense her quiet and gentle spirit, and loved to see her smile and laugh at the kids' antics. I never got to see her do the 2 step to some of the bluegrass music she loved. I think its fitting that since her oldest grandson has moved back to where his roots are, he has fallen in love with bluegrass and has even written a song about Mamaw and Papaw.

Here are a few of the words:

Betty Ruth

Oh, Betty Ruth, won't you tell me that you love me? And, if so, will you write me while I'm in the army? Send me your picture with your eyes a'colored blue. I love a girl I met in Cracker's Neck Virginia.

Chorus:

Cause a love that starts inthe sticks of Virginia, Can reach this man when he's half way 'round the world. And a love that starts today, can last a lifetime. Like I always said, 'If it ain't forever, it ain't love.'

When this war is over, you will find me. Thumbin' my way down the Redbud Highway, Into the arms of the woman I made a promise, To come back home where I belong, to Betty Ruth.

Well, you've been my wife, twice you've been a mother. You've been Mamaw, over and over again. And when the Lord decides to take you home, there will be a whole lot of home He's takin' away from me.

Copyright A. Hill 2006